10/1/1989
I got on the 6:00 pm bus back to College and arrived at 11:00pm. The ride wasn't so bad because I slept most of the way. While I was home, I bought a really nice radio and some incense to make my room smell nice. Even though I was sleeping, my thoughts were still on my brother. Thinking about him really doesn’t solve anything. I realize that every time I think about him, I get depressed and start to cry. And getting upset is not the best thing for me now, especially because I am trying to study. I’ll get over it in my own time in my own way. Right now, I have to get serious with my schoolwork to prove to myself that I can do it because I know I can. Also, for rmy mom and grandma - to prove it to them. To make them proud of me. At least they have one child to make them proud, but I wish it could be both of us.
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Looking back on that college journal entry, I see something I didn’t fully realize then: the balance between personal emotion and professional focus. Even in my younger years, while riding a bus back to school, I was developing the leadership muscle without knowing it. It’s in those moments of inner conflict—when emotions are pulling you one way and responsibilities are tugging you another—that leaders are born.
As leaders, we all have those moments. We’re balancing the weight of our personal lives, the expectations of others, and the pressure to deliver results. Whether it’s thinking about family or facing personal challenges, the emotional load doesn’t just disappear when it’s time to perform. But learning how to balance that load, and knowing when to set things aside and focus, is a skill that requires intentional practice.
The Art of Balancing Work and Emotion
Back then, I was figuring out how to compartmentalize my feelings for the sake of progress. This isn’t about ignoring our emotions but learning when and where to process them so they don’t overwhelm our leadership roles. If I hadn’t found a way to focus on my schoolwork despite the emotional turmoil, I wouldn’t have succeeded. The same is true for leadership today.
Think about it: how often do you let personal or even professional frustrations cloud your judgment? How many times have you been sitting in a meeting, replaying a family argument in your head, unable to be fully present? It’s human. But balancing those emotions with the work we’re responsible for is what separates good leaders from great ones.
Intentional Practice: A Necessary Leadership Skill
Balancing work and personal life isn’t just something that happens—it’s a skill that needs intentional practice. Like that bus ride, there will always be something else on your mind—something that pulls you away from your focus. Learning how to refocus isn’t about pretending those emotions don’t exist; it’s about setting boundaries within yourself.
As a leader, you might need to practice taking a few minutes to clear your mind before a big meeting. You might need to intentionally set time aside to process emotions so they don’t overwhelm you at crucial moments. Just like I had to get serious with my studies back then, today’s leaders must intentionally get serious about mastering their emotional balance.
Proving It to Yourself—and to Others
In that journal entry, I was determined to prove something to myself and to the people who mattered most to me. Leadership is no different. Every day, we’re working to prove to ourselves that we can handle the weight of our responsibilities. It’s not just about showing others that we can do it—it’s about reaffirming our own confidence in our abilities.
Back then, I was trying to make my mom and grandma proud. Today, I’m trying to make a difference for students, teachers, and fellow leaders. The stakes might be higher now, but the process is the same: focus, balance, and the discipline to push forward even when it’s tough.
So, courageous leaders, here’s my question for you: How are you balancing your emotional load and your leadership responsibilities? How are you proving to yourself that you can handle both?
It’s not about choosing one over the other; it’s about practicing the skill of balancing both—because that’s where real leadership grows.
Keep going.
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